NICE

UPHOLSTERY JOB

A

Creative Commentary

By

David A. Archer

02/15/1968

10/19/2006

It may sound a bit off of the deep end, but I have even heard some of them squeak like they were squeakie toys with great little upholstery jobs. To them I am sure they feel as though they are roaring like lions... but it just comes out like a squeak. A squeeze toy squeak.

It is hard to determine just what many of them are really good for other than perhaps some form of living display organism for upholstery designs... and of course little consuming machines waiting expectantly for the daily dose of special treats just for being such good upholstery displays... and of course squeaking.

A person could even be drawn to envy the little bastards to some degree. They get every comfort known to man and they aren't even human.

They get carried around. They get special treats for no reason. Some of them even have special carrying containers that are like moving condos.

Cats don't even have it that good, and all that they do is squeak and prance around with their gleaming upholstery job showing for the world to see.

I wonder sometimes just how small they can breed them? I have seen some examples being not much more than the size of the average mans hand... but I still have to wonder if they can get even smaller? Squeakier, even?

Could it be possible that someday they will even be available in such small versions that there could be a resurgence in the popularity of gumball machines? Forcing grown people to fight and argue like children at the grocery store, over who's turn it is to turn the nob and receive their squeaking upholstery job prize? Perhaps even complete with a collar and leash.. and of course a similar "breed" certification one might expect in the average, popular doll toy box. Though of course in regard to the certification of breed and authenticity pertaining to the small, squeaking upholstery display just out of the gumball bubble and already wagging its tail in the expectation of some tasty treat....

...for nothing!

Nothing, that is.... except just being a squeaker.

Squeakers with great little upholstery jobs!